Making friends as an adult is HARD. Despite moving around, I was always one of those kids who made friends easily and never had trouble finding people who shared similar interests and hobbies. However, as I've gotten older it feels like meeting like-minded people is more of a challenge. I'm less tolerable and more specific when it comes to finding traits I can deal with. And when it comes down to it, I just miss my best friends - the ones who know me and love me for being me... and vice versa of course!
When I relocated to Singapore in 2012, I was ready to move and start a new life. At the time I felt like I had exhausted all the possibilities in Manila and was ready to start anew. I already had long-time friends living in Singapore but I proactively went out to make sure that I didn't get stuck within my group. I attended events and dinners and got to meet lots of people through all walks of life. I also made friends through work - I ended up working for two different companies during my stay in Singapore - and had a grand ol' time with them. Some of them remained as acquaintances but a good few blossomed into friendships and are now people I regard as lifelong friends.
My close group of friends while living in Singapore were mostly made up of expats and foreigners, most having moved to the Lion City because of their jobs. We were all "orphans" of sorts, without family nearby so we eventually became one another's family as we bonded and celebrated holidays and traditions together. There were a few times I would get homesick - not necessarily for the city, but more for my family - and I can honestly say that these people made it a lot easier.
I've now been back in Manila for eight months and I have to admit it's been a struggle making friends. I'm no longer the girl who likes to party and be in on the scene. I prefer a few drinks at the pub, checking out new restaurants (you're spoiled for choice in Manila!), going to movies, and traveling out of town to explore or just relax outside the city. The people I know from when I was growing up, in school, etc. who were once friends are now more like acquaintances as we've gone on our separate paths. It's nice to catch up once in a while but then you realise that you're just very different people today who happen to share a fun yet distant past.
My best friends are scattered throughout the world - from Australia and Singapore to the UK and the US. Thanks to social media we're able to communicate quite often but we all know it's just not the same when all you want to do is call your BFF to meet up for a bottle of wine or two after a long ass day at work. Sometimes you just need to vent and not be judged, or need them to smack some sense into you, or sometimes you just need their presence without having to say a single word and it feels like the Universe is whole again.
Here's to hopefully meeting more like-minded people and being able to call this place home again, even for a little while.
This post is dedicated to my dearest friends, near and far - you know who you are. Thank you for always having my back. You know I'll pick up that bat for you when you need it!
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